Like many first-time parents, Jordan and Jon Wagoner were in awe when their son, Remy, was born in July at WellSpan York Hospital.

Jordan witnessed her son coming into the world, watching as a gestational carrier delivered him via a cesarean section. Her husband cut the cord.

“I heard his first cry, and I just lost it,” Jordan says.

“I feel like I just floated into the room,” Jon says of the moment he got to see his son for the first time. “I felt outside my body. It was the craziest feeling”

The Michigan couple took Remy to a room to get to know him. At the same time, their gestational carrier, who lives in York County, went to her nearby room to recover from the birth.

Remy is one of 18 babies born to gestational carriers or surrogates at the hospital this year, a number that has more than doubled in the past five years. Couples and single parents have come to York to welcome babies in this way from all over the world – two came from Israel this year alone – as well as from all over the country, including Tennessee, Minnesota, Florida and Kentucky.

The maternity unit at WellSpan York Hospital prepares carefully for these births, communicating with both the gestational carrier and the intended parents early in the process to map out a birth plan that respects everyone’s wishes and provides a personalized, compassionate experience for all who are involved.

“It is phenomenal to be a part of this journey,” says Sharon Walb, a nurse manager in labor and delivery who oversees gestational carrier births. “I love it. Just seeing these couples! They talk about wanting something so badly and for so long, and then you watch them as this baby is handed to them…I have goose bumps just talking about it. It’s amazing.”

Paths to a family

Parents take a different path to having a family for a variety of reasons. Some are single but want to have a family. Some are same-sex couples. Some are unable to create or carry a pregnancy for a variety of medical reasons.

Parents can choose to give birth through a gestational carrier, a surrogate, or through open adoption. WellSpan hosts all three types of births.

A gestational carrier is a woman who carries a pregnancy for another person or couple without being genetically related to the child. The intended parents’ egg or a donor egg is used to create an embryo, which is then transferred to the gestational carrier.

A surrogate offers her eggs to create the pregnancy, so she is genetically related to the child.

Open adoption is an arrangement between birth parents and adoptive parents that allows some degree of contact between the birth parents and the adoptive parents before and after the baby is born.

The Wagoners' story

Jordan, 38, formerly a teacher and a Pilates instructor, and Jon, 41, a software engineer, opted to find a gestational carrier. Jordan has ulcerative colitis, an inflammatory autoimmune disease that makes pregnancy difficult and dangerous due to the drugs she takes and the impact a pregnancy would have on her.

The couple learned in November of last year that the gestational carrier was pregnant with an embryo that was created via in vitro fertilization with an egg from Jordan with sperm from Jon. They waited a few weeks so they could share their happy news with their families at Thanksgiving, which felt natural on a day devoted to gratitude.

The gestational carrier received her prenatal care from WellSpan providers, keeping the couple in the loop via text messages and Facetime chats. The gestational carrier even used a Doppler device the Wagoners sent her to record the fetal heartbeat and share it with them, via an app.

“We built a relationship,” Jordan says. “We had a baby shower in May, and she came so we got to meet face to face for the first time.”

The Wagoners and the gestational carrier designed a birth plan, in conjunction with the Wagoners’ attorney, sending it to Sharon. As always, Sharon reviewed the plan with everyone involved, making sure all details and questions were addressed.

“They decide who they want in the room when the baby is born, and what happens afterward. If there are other children, they decide if and how they want them to be involved,” Sharon says. “We make sure they have everything they need. We ask them, ‘Do you have a go bag packed? What is in the bag?’ We set them up with donor breast milk or formula if they need it.”

Waiting for Remy's birth at WellSpan York Hospital.

The Wagoners wanted their gestational carrier to feel comfortable and included. Her husband was present for Remy’s birth, and she was cared for afterward in a room near the complimentary one that WellSpan provides for intended parents after the birth. The Wagoners wanted to be able to check in on her and to allow her and her family to see Remy.

A magical time

The Wagoners spent two days at WellSpan after Remy’s birth, a time that felt magical to them.

“We went to the post-partum room and did skin-to-skin contact right away,” Jordan says. “The nurses were coming in and checking him during one of the most important times of our life. We did not sleep.”

Says Jon, with a laugh, “Mostly we were staring at him in awe.”

“Everything was a smooth process and we felt like the hospital knew what they were doing, which put us at ease,” Jon says. “It was detailed and laid out. Everyone knew what the plan was and was very helpful and receptive to get everything done.”

The Wagoners now are enmeshed in the happy chaos of new parenthood. Jordan is staying home to be with Remy and Jon is still spending a lot of time staring at his son, in awe.

“He is growing and learning and rolling over and making funny faces,” he says. “It’s just like never-ending happiness.”

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